*Coward: a person who lacks the courage to do or endure unpleasant or dangerous things.
Nepal is no place for cowards. Had I known that in January, I never would have signed up as a trip chaperone, for I was born a coward, and have lived my entire life avoiding anything remotely dangerous. But how fortuitous for me, that I didn’t know, because I would have missed the trip of a lifetime!
The four hour bus ride from Kathmandu to Border Lands careened up and down mountain roads with no guard rail in sight; I had a window seat where It was all to easy to imagine plunging over the side of the cliff to certain death. I finally just shut my eyes and pretended to sleep. It was a little too early in the trip to admit my cowardice to my traveling companions.
Along with my physical cowardice, I also have acrophobia--an irrational or debilitating fear of heights. Our service trip began by walking 5 kilometers to arrive at Panchakanya School. You can imagine my horror, when, in order to reach the school, we had to cross a 100 foot suspension bridge swaying over the raging Bhote Koshi river. My heart sunk, my ears began to ring, my legs turned to jelly, and I hadn’t even taken the first step. I watched with incredulity as each one of our students scampered across without a backward glance. Several of them were even walking side by side, chatting!
Reminding myself that I was a chaperone, and I couldn’t do my job telepathically, I croaked for help. Immediately, Prem, our master guide was at my side, and began to calm me down. I have no friends or family members that could have convinced me to cross that bridge. I would have looked them in the eye and told them “No Way!”, along with a few other scalding words. But Life is full of surprises. Who would have guessed that on the other side of the world, there lived a man who could get me to do something I never thought possible? I knew that he was one of Nepal’s most experienced and fearless guides. It also helped that I had heard how he’d saved a woman from falling off a cliff by leaping after her. I felt reasonably confident that he would do the same for me. He patiently took both my hands and slowly led me across. I swear that walk lasted 20 minutes, but in reality, it was probably only 2. Upon reaching the other side, everyone -- our students, staff, villagers and children--all were there to congratulate me. I felt like the star of a reality television show--and not the one who wins the series.
There were other challenges remaining, but none quite so daunting as crossing that bridge, which I did another 7 times, each time, clinging tightly to Prem’s hands. I easily resisted the peer pressure to go canyoning, by volunteering to photograph everyone else. As a chaperone, I don’t think I had a prouder moment than when I watched all of our kids, Trish, and Jennifer successfully rappel down 150 meters of waterfalls. Absolutely amazing. The overnight trek up to the top of a mountain was exhausting, but exhilarating. We felt like we were on top of the world as we watched the sun rise over terraced villages as far away as China. It was breathtakingly beautiful. The number of magical moments consistently outweighed the fearful ones, and I found myself not wanting the adventure to end.
Has my view of myself changed? Not really. I’m still know myself to be a big chicken. I probably won’t ever choose to go to the top of the Empire State building or the Eiffel tower. But, I will always have the memory of accomplishing one seemingly impossible thing.
With heartfelt gratitude and appreciation, to the man who made it possible--Prem, the fearless!
Nepal is no place for cowards. Had I known that in January, I never would have signed up as a trip chaperone, for I was born a coward, and have lived my entire life avoiding anything remotely dangerous. But how fortuitous for me, that I didn’t know, because I would have missed the trip of a lifetime!
The four hour bus ride from Kathmandu to Border Lands careened up and down mountain roads with no guard rail in sight; I had a window seat where It was all to easy to imagine plunging over the side of the cliff to certain death. I finally just shut my eyes and pretended to sleep. It was a little too early in the trip to admit my cowardice to my traveling companions.
Along with my physical cowardice, I also have acrophobia--an irrational or debilitating fear of heights. Our service trip began by walking 5 kilometers to arrive at Panchakanya School. You can imagine my horror, when, in order to reach the school, we had to cross a 100 foot suspension bridge swaying over the raging Bhote Koshi river. My heart sunk, my ears began to ring, my legs turned to jelly, and I hadn’t even taken the first step. I watched with incredulity as each one of our students scampered across without a backward glance. Several of them were even walking side by side, chatting!
Reminding myself that I was a chaperone, and I couldn’t do my job telepathically, I croaked for help. Immediately, Prem, our master guide was at my side, and began to calm me down. I have no friends or family members that could have convinced me to cross that bridge. I would have looked them in the eye and told them “No Way!”, along with a few other scalding words. But Life is full of surprises. Who would have guessed that on the other side of the world, there lived a man who could get me to do something I never thought possible? I knew that he was one of Nepal’s most experienced and fearless guides. It also helped that I had heard how he’d saved a woman from falling off a cliff by leaping after her. I felt reasonably confident that he would do the same for me. He patiently took both my hands and slowly led me across. I swear that walk lasted 20 minutes, but in reality, it was probably only 2. Upon reaching the other side, everyone -- our students, staff, villagers and children--all were there to congratulate me. I felt like the star of a reality television show--and not the one who wins the series.
There were other challenges remaining, but none quite so daunting as crossing that bridge, which I did another 7 times, each time, clinging tightly to Prem’s hands. I easily resisted the peer pressure to go canyoning, by volunteering to photograph everyone else. As a chaperone, I don’t think I had a prouder moment than when I watched all of our kids, Trish, and Jennifer successfully rappel down 150 meters of waterfalls. Absolutely amazing. The overnight trek up to the top of a mountain was exhausting, but exhilarating. We felt like we were on top of the world as we watched the sun rise over terraced villages as far away as China. It was breathtakingly beautiful. The number of magical moments consistently outweighed the fearful ones, and I found myself not wanting the adventure to end.
Has my view of myself changed? Not really. I’m still know myself to be a big chicken. I probably won’t ever choose to go to the top of the Empire State building or the Eiffel tower. But, I will always have the memory of accomplishing one seemingly impossible thing.
With heartfelt gratitude and appreciation, to the man who made it possible--Prem, the fearless!
